- to find a way

publicerat i thoughts & feelings;

Two months have passed since I left my second family and home. It feels unreal that it's so close but so far away at the same time. Because so much have changed since I came back to Sweden - I got my own apartment, I'm working full time at the hospital as an assistant nurse, I've turned 22, I've celebrated swedish christmas. I've done all the swedish things I've missed. But the feeling of having a second home is stronger than ever. Because my life with the family was going on when I was there, but it's more clear when I'm far away from them how important they are in my life, how much impact they had and have. I'm not gonna lie - it was horrible to leave them and come back to Sweden. It's been so hard to be away from my boys I've spent two years with. And I didn't feel like I belonged here anymore. I just wanted to go back. I texted my amazing host mom everyday and said I wanted to be with them. Because that's what I really wanted to. But I realized that life goes on, even if you don't want it to go on. I needed to find myself again, back here that was my home.

I've talked to them a lot since I left, I got letters the other day that made my tears fall. I know they will be a part of my life for ever and I will see the kids grow up. They will be at my wedding. Meet my kids. They will be there always. Because family is something you choose - and they are a part of my family ❤️